Does the Strange Cal Stankovich Party have superdelegates? Absolutely! They come from the planet Krypton and have the ability to fly. They have superhuman strength and can shoot laser-like beams out of their eyes. That's the reason that they are "super" delegates. That is also the reason that they are not to be trifled with. Let's make
sure they don't dominate our party and make all the decisions, though. Be sure to carry Kryptonite with you at all times and use it to influence your superdelegates' votes. But keep in mind that they were granted these powers by the party and so if you don't like it, too bad. Tough luck, idiot. They might just burn you to death with their laser eyes. So keep that kryptonite handy.
sure they don't dominate our party and make all the decisions, though. Be sure to carry Kryptonite with you at all times and use it to influence your superdelegates' votes. But keep in mind that they were granted these powers by the party and so if you don't like it, too bad. Tough luck, idiot. They might just burn you to death with their laser eyes. So keep that kryptonite handy.Is coffee made out of coffee energy? That is clearly not a political question, but rather a general knowlege inquiry to test the limits of our brave party leader's vast scientific understanding. The answer: duh! Coffee is made out of ground coffee beans and hot water, idiot. We don't have an atom smasher to peer into the atomic elements of coffee, so there is no way to be sure. We just have 
to trust science and the Bible which tell us that coffee is made out of angels. Are farts made out of fart energy, or just fart gas? Let's consider what Yakov Smirnov would say. "A fart is as a fart does," he would say. And he would be right, my friends.
to trust science and the Bible which tell us that coffee is made out of angels. Are farts made out of fart energy, or just fart gas? Let's consider what Yakov Smirnov would say. "A fart is as a fart does," he would say. And he would be right, my friends. Please keep asking questions, we love to respond.
Two other topics of intrest this week: the composition of Jesus, and rhetorical questions.
It has been said that Jesus Christ was both %100 Man and %100 God. This creates a logical contradiction. Technically, it's impossible to be %200 of anything. But then to add on the extra component of Jesus' obvious %500 kickass-ness, creates an even more perplexing conundrum. 500 + 100 + 100 = 700. How can he be %700? The answer is simple: he was Jesus, idiot. He turned water into tequila and then realized it wasn't invented yet, so he turned it into wine, just so his disciples didn't get wasted or freaked out about the devil worm. There was no such thing as high-alcohol-content wine like M/D 20/20 ("Maddog") back in the day, and Jesus didn't want to touch that with a 10-foot pole.
Why do people ask questions that can't be answered? Is there any answer for that very question? Should there be? No. There isn't. It's that simple. People just love asking questions that they can't answer because they're idiots and they just want to pass the time. Duh. People are good at passing the time and they're excellent at being idiots.
Now, do we really want to get the Strange Cal Stankovich party on the ballot? Probably not. We're not rich socialites and it would ruin the fun anyways. Sorry to dash your hopes, America. But still watch out for our Superdelegates. Laser eyes.
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